You look like I need a drink.

I have been doing tons of marketing research in L.A. learning to adapt to the sun, plastic people, poor drivers and trying to find the ways of becoming successful. How do I become famous like L.Lo and such?

L.A. is a drastic scene switch from my hipster land of Brooklyn that I miss oh-so-much. Silverlake and Echo Park hipsters are frightening. First, their hair is way better than mine, they need a vast improvement on their "vintage" wardrobe (May I shamelessly plug My Grandma's Closet) and their black swollen eyes from "nose candy" cannot be justified when bars close at 2AM.

But I have to fit in, right? So I ask myself, what do all of these Los Angelenos have that I don't?
Then it dawned on me! D.U.I!

(ellipses)

How can I make this happen? It's Friday, 5PM, the work week is done. I have to endure the 405 freeway traffic all the way home and how will I ever have time to get boozed and dressed with enough time to enjoy my 2AM curfew night?

Never underestimate the innovative.
Drive Thru Fast Food. Drive Thru Starbucks. Drive Thru ATM. Drive Thru Pharmacies.

And now, the validity to drinking and driving.